Red

You laugh at me because I am different. I laugh at you because you are all the same. Hey hey a big kick in the teeth to all girls who are mean and rude for no reason! You are not a lady, etiquette the fuck up!

Work in 2 hours. Productive day, cleaned and feel so fresh, ate way too much though. All I do is eat these days, it’s a never ending hunger, do I have a big mac for dinner? I have everything organized for my future and I’m so happy yay welcome winter, I’m looking on the Internet at all the things I can’t afford while my credit card stares at me.

Combing my hair and making my bed. He’s coming over, but all I can think of is you. This whole situation reminds me of you. I am probably doing the wrong thing and my gut tells me so,but I’m addicted to that feeling. As bad as it feels, each time this happens i want to take it to the next step every time just to push the limit, see how far i can get, see what im allowed to say. I always push too far. I never find my way back either, it’s just a constant winding road of sex and indecisive lust and failed relationships and revenge. Lol , my life. And so the adventure and pain begins again , why do I like it so much? Is it time to start treading on others again because others hurt me? How does the world work? I think I just need to chill the fuck out and look really unnatractve so he doesn’t want to have sex with me

So my work is getting renovated,which I thought would be scary and claustrophobic… but actually it was kind of fun today, standing on a plank of wood serving people and making coffees while working basically within a construction site, people digging things and like I dunno it made me want to be a labourer Wtf no it didn’t hahhahaa I haven’t had much sleep the past few nights I have had so many people in and out of my room, for instance my best friend Kayla which isn’t out of the usual , but these 2 boys came over last night and we got Icecream and laughed and it was cute and fun but now one of them is telling me to get with the other one and it’s gay cause he is so and sos best friend and we have known each other for years and yeah been there done that mdore mdore mdore fick fuck kkcckk kkcckk I have to work at 5 am tomorrow, my hair my hair fuck fuck what what what huhhhh okay I’m just high and I have noone to talk to one of my favourite people who I talk to 247 is a blH bkH blAh what yhr fick am i talking about anyway long story short I live the good life and I’m high bye